Living your life, huh? Are you living your life? Do you even know how?--I mean, do you know who "you" are, the entity that fills your body, or is your mask up trying to fit in and conform with society? It is shocking to be able to reveal who you are to "be yourself," as they say (they being society (including you and me)).
What is the self? Where did that inner voice reading this now come from?
To be unstuck from the inside of your mind through attempts in finding the true identity, we can start by judging ourselves as we judge others. Not an out of body experience per se, but that's the best analogy.
In the book One, None, and a Hundred Thousand by Luigi Pirandello, the protagonist attempted to change his own perspective into third person mode. He was able to see himself as a stranger of whom he acquires no information at all. He was intentionally using his judgmental skills that are used automatically when in public, but on himself this time. In this excerpt, he was looking at himself in a mirror. "He could be seen, but could not see. He was to me what I was to others; I could be seen but could not see myself." His consciousness was outside of his body peering in, and his body was an empty vessel. Just think, his body was still pumping blood and the cells were still multiplying, but there was no chemical activity going on in the brain for a consciousness. Ever look at yourself like that? It's spooky.
How much of a different perspective is that? Literally everything that was experienced in life was done in the body (with a small exception to some dreams), but that doesn't make you, "you." So what does?
Memories, maybe. But so does the personality, if you're more right side brained or left side, the processing of environmental factors, the genetics from the parents' brains. But how do others see you?--Because they don't know any of that about you. They know details, but even when they hear of your experiences, they translate it to make sense to them; empathy tends to be our #1 skill with communication. They could take a small event from your life and develop an entire life story for you and base their emotions on that when they don't really know squat. So this journey on self discovery better be with "me, myself, and I," the holy trinity.
How can we get out of the trained mindset of mimicking the skin deep acknowledgement of others? How do we stick up for ourselves before we are whacked back down like a mole so we are not too weird or too quirky?
Confidence! Only you and other people can know your true self if you first present it. No one else will do it for you. Also, it doesn't matter if other people can see it or not because this is your perspective. Maybe them seeing it will inspire them to get to know themselves, but the goal is for you to introspect, and the reaction of others is just a response, not a goal nor an influence.
I feel it important to reflect and be truthful to myself (truth is my word of the year) so I can have a better self awareness of my actions and how I'm treating both myself and the people around me. Know yourself and take care of yourself all #2019. "What goes on in your innermost being is worthy of your whole love." (Rainer Rilke).
~j